But

I do like to suffer

I do like the pain

I take it in - blank, plain

not yet painted

not yet named

Every animal around me flees

from the roar of the woods

But I freeze

such cold is the grip the night has

on my wrist, tightening my skin 

I hear them calling for me, but I 

never fear for my life

My pain comes tender, like the spring

budding through the branches, she contains

so many lives within that burst

right on stage, spill;

I pull the curtains down, I don't let you see

I hold my gasp

in

I do like the sting

of the wasp, I do like the buzz

of the city within

Every animal around me flees

from the roar of the train

But I stand still

Curiosity comes in full speed, and I

take the hit

I never fear for my life

Sweatsong

I like to pretend that I know

how it is.

That not everybody

is meant to be.

But still I wish

I transform

into the man of your dreams,

into the very rose that pours

its blood in your sleep.

I like to pretend that I know

that it's not a thing

of adults to be

lovesick.

It's not a thing

of adults to be

me.

My pillow is

so heavy with secrets,

so soaked the shirt

I lay with.

I like to pretend they're the tidiest,

driest, most immaculate bedclothes

you have ever seen.

You never see my face before

I rinse.

Dusk Song IV

There is so little time.

There is so little time before

she arrives.

So little

time before she finds

us naked, in her own bed.

There is so little time.

Recess only lasts for

half an hour.

Any minute now, the bell

will chime us back

to class.

So little,

so little time before

it's dark.

Deseo terrenal XXVII

(07/2017)

Siempre me han enseñado que no debe ser, que no debe ser.

Que lo tengo que contener, que lo tengo que esconder, que no puede ser.

Que no me debo acercar, lejos me he de mantener.

Como si me tuviera que avergonzar. Callade he de permanecer.

Yo quisiera mostrar lo que guardo. Pero pareciera que nadie lo quiere conocer. ¿Tan espantoso puede ser?

Rezo por alguien que no quisiese echar a correr. Que abriese el vado ante mí; que me dejase pasar y acercarme hasta sí. Que desatase mis contenciones por mí y me dejase, por una vez, 

desobedecer.